(ו) יְהוֹשֻׁעַ בֶּן פְּרַחְיָה וְנִתַּאי הָאַרְבֵּלִי קִבְּלוּ מֵהֶם. יְהוֹשֻׁעַ בֶּן פְּרַחְיָה אוֹמֵר, עֲשֵׂה לְךָ רַב, וּקְנֵה לְךָ חָבֵר, וֶהֱוֵי דָן אֶת כָּל הָאָדָם לְכַף זְכוּת:
(6) Yehoshua ben Perachiah and Nitai of Arbel received from them. Yehoshua ben Perachia says, "Make for yourself a mentor, acquire for yourself a friend and judge every person as meritorious."
A true friend will not only help you in life, but he will also try to prevent you from doing an injustice and will encourage you to do good. A truly unselfish friendship is a blessing to both sides.
The exchange of opinions between equals leads to the discovery of the truth
Avot d'Rabbi Nassan: "How does one acquire a friend? A person should acquire a friend for himself by eating and drinking with him, by studying Torah and debating with him, by lodging with him, by sharing private thoughts with him-thoughts regarding Torah and life. And when they debate matters of Torah and importance, his friend will respond to him, and thus the bonds of friendship and truth will be strengthened."
b. What is the importance of a friend over a rav?
Lev Simchah, Maggdei HaEmet: A rav encourages fear of Hashem, but a friend can lead to love of Hashem, which we learn is even greater than fear (רמב’ן– שמות כ:ח)
(ז) נִתַּאי הָאַרְבֵּלִי אוֹמֵר, הַרְחֵק מִשָּׁכֵן רָע, וְאַל תִּתְחַבֵּר לָרָשָׁע, וְאַל תִּתְיָאֵשׁ מִן הַפֻּרְעָנוּת:
(7) Nitai of Arbel says: "Distance [yourself] from a bad neighbor, do not befriend an evildoer and do not despair of punishment."
Distance [yourself] from a bad neighbor: Do not associate with a lawless man, for you cannot become friends without learning from him, without imitating his actions, without being influenced by his views
The only way to earn esteem and respect for yourself is to esteem and respect other people
הרבה למדתי מרבותי ומחבירי יותר מרבותי ומתלמידי יותר מכולן
I have learned a lot from my Rabbeim, from my friends I have learned more than from my Rabbeim, and from my students I have learned the most.
(ג) הוּא הָיָה אוֹמֵר, אַל תְּהִי בָז לְכָל אָדָם, וְאַל תְּהִי מַפְלִיג לְכָל דָּבָר, שֶׁאֵין לְךָ אָדָם שֶׁאֵין לוֹ שָׁעָה וְאֵין לְךָ דָבָר שֶׁאֵין לוֹ מָקוֹם:
(3) He would say: Do not disparage anyone, and do not shun any thing. For you have no man who does not have his hour, and you have no thing that does not have its place.
(יא) וַֽיִּשְׁמְע֞וּ שְׁלֹ֣שֶׁת ׀ רֵעֵ֣י אִיּ֗וֹב אֵ֣ת כָּל־הָרָעָ֣ה הַזֹּאת֮ הַבָּ֣אָה עָלָיו֒ וַיָּבֹ֙אוּ֙ אִ֣ישׁ מִמְּקֹמ֔וֹ אֱלִיפַ֤ז הַתֵּימָנִי֙ וּבִלְדַּ֣ד הַשּׁוּחִ֔י וְצוֹפַ֖ר הַנַּֽעֲמָתִ֑י וַיִּוָּעֲד֣וּ יַחְדָּ֔ו לָב֥וֹא לָנֽוּד־ל֖וֹ וּֽלְנַחֲמֽוֹ׃
Give me a chavruta/friend or give me death!
(יח) לֹֽא־תִקֹּ֤ם וְלֹֽא־תִטֹּר֙ אֶת־בְּנֵ֣י עַמֶּ֔ךָ וְאָֽהַבְתָּ֥ לְרֵעֲךָ֖ כָּמ֑וֹךָ אֲנִ֖י ה'
(18) Thou shalt not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself: I am the LORD.