The Raatan Virus (A Talmudic Drama)

THE RAATAN VIRUS

(Adapted from Talmud Ketubot 77b)

Textual background: The Talmud offers a bewildering account of a notable rabbi who dies from a strange plague but manages to outwit the angel of death. Judging by some of the symptoms elsewhere in the original text, it is possible that this plague was some variant of smallpox, but the social distancing measures in the story reminded me of our own COVID pandemic. Considering the age and the nature of the source, it's not really possible to definitively say if this was originally written as an old legend or as some other kind of literary work.

In this adaptation, I’ve tried to highlight the way the text could be read as a wry, absurdist drama. The first scene involves an elaborate discussion of some kind of experimental surgery. The second scene features some sort of one-upmanship on the part of public health officials deciding on social distancing measures. The last scene involves a noble person willing to sacrifice their life to assist the sick and ends up on an adventure with the angel of death.

All of the named characters and their lines are essentially unchanged from the original text. The unnamed characters, the use of career titles, and the names of the locations are my own contribution.

SCENE #1

PROF. ABAYE

Today we are studying the raatan virus outbreak which occurred in the last century. This deadly pandemic took the lives of many during our great-grandparent’s generation. In the face of this terrible public health crisis, successful cures were very difficult to come by. Very quickly the doctors and leaders realised that the only viable option was containment and quarantine. They began to enact strict public health measures in a desperate attempt to reduce the spread of this terrible disease.

STUDENT A

What was the raatan virus like? What were its symptoms?

ABAYE

Anyone inflicted with the raatan plague would develop watery eyes, a watery nose. Their mouths would drool without cause. And worst of all, flies would rest upon their heads.

STUDENT B

That actually doesn’t sound that bad.

ABAYE

Ah yes, I forgot to mention the real cause for concern. The real nasty part of the raatan virus was the parasite inside the person’s brain.

STUDENT A

Was there any cure for such a dreadful illness?

ABAYE

Not really. But there was one doctor who had begun offering experimental treatment that involved creating a potion mixed with a bundle of pila grass, and labdanum resin, ground walnut shells, the shavings of smoothed animal hides, sagebrush leaves, and the leaves of the red date palm. One cooks them together and brings the patient into a house made entirely of marble.

STUDENT C

But what if no such marble house is available?

ABAYE

Then they would bring the patient into a house whose walls have the thickness of seven bricks and one small brick. And the one performing the treatment pours three hundred cups of this mixture on the patient’s head until his skull is soft to allow for a clean incision. Once the brain is exposed one brings four myrtle leaves and lifts up each foot of the parasite, placing a leaf under each foot. Finally, you remove the parasite with some tweezers.

STUDENT B

And then you are cured, right?

ABAYE

Not yet! You then have to burn the parasite, because if you don’t, it will return to re-infect the patient.

SCENE #2

MAYOR OF LYDDA

I call this emergency session to order. Our order of business today is the city's response to the emerging pandemic. We need to implement a suppression and containment strategy to dissuade the city residents from taking part in any risky behaviour. We must preserve lives no matter the economic cost.

YOHANAN

We must be very vigilant around the flies found on those infected with the raatan virus. The flies are carriers of the disease. Close contact must be avoided.

MAYOR

So it seems clear we must enact social distancing measures. Okay, what provisions should the public health order stipulate?

ZEIRA

We must stipulate that all non-infected persons must keep enough distance from those infected that you would not be able to catch their scent as the wind blows past.

ELAZAR

We must not allow anyone who is not infected to enter the same building where those infected reside.

AMI

We must avoid these people entirely. Outdoor cafes must be shuttered if even a single person on that street becomes infected.

MAYOR

Alright then. All those in favour of enacting the strictest of public health measures say "aye".

ALL PRESENT

Aye!

SCENE #3

CITY OFFICER

Under the new public health order, this hospital is now permanently closed.

JOSHUA BEN LEVI

But what about the people infected? Are they not worthy of our care? We must not abandon them in their time of need.

CITY OFFICER

I understand your position but this is the directive from all of the experts from the city council.

JOSHUA BEN LEVI

I cannot abide by this decision and leave the infected people to die alone. If my faith teaches me to love and live with grace, certainly it will protect me from illness.

….

JOSHUA BEN LEVI

I can see that death is near.

DEATH

Joshua ben Levi, your time has come. But since you were such a righteous person you deserve to die in the manner you see fit.

JOSHUA BEN LEVI

Very well, if I am to die, please first show me my place in paradise.

DEATH

Very well, if that is your request I will take you there.

JOSHUA BEN LEVI

Wait! Before we embark on this journey you must give me your knife that you use to kill mortals, in case you frighten me on the way.

DEATH

Very well, you may take my knife.

….

DEATH

Here we are at the gates of paradise.

JOSHUA BEN LEVI

I want to see this for myself. Lift me up so I can see.

DEATH

Alright. Let me lift you up.

JOSHUA BEN LEVI

(Jumps into paradise)

Haha! I’ve made it across and I have kept your knife. No longer will you strike down my people with your blade of death.

DEATH

Wait a minute!

(Grabs the corner of Joshua ben Levi’s cloak)

Come back here!

JOSHUA BEN LEVI

I swear that I will not come with you.

DEATH

It seems we are at an impasse. What do the heavenly beings say we must do?

HEAVENLY VOICE

If this person ever in their life made a promise and did not honour it, then concerning this promise they have just taken, they must return to this world with the Angel of Death. But if in their lifetime they never made a promise they did not honour then they do not need to return.

DEATH

It is my misfortune that Joshua ben Levi is such a person who honoured their word and he will remain in paradise. But at least give me back my knife!

JOSHUA BEN LEVI

Absolutely not! I cannot allow you to continue to bring death to my people.

HEAVENLY VOICE

Joshua ben Levi, you must return the knife. It is necessary for all created beings to die. Death is the way of the world.

Now that you have entered paradise, let all make way for the son of Levi. Make way for the son of Levi.