Koleinu, Kulanu: Our Voices, Together

Opening:

Our Mishpacha Group learning today is called Koleinu, Kulanu - which means "Our voices, All of us" or "Our Voices, Together," so as we move into the learning together, let's begin with, a wordless song of the soul:

Mishpacha Leader's Choice of Niggun (e.g., Bina's Niggun - Joey Weisenberg

Framing:

We have intentionally come together to strengthen and build community throughout this Shavuot retreat - hence, "Kulanu", which means "all of us". We all belong. We are all worthy of receiving, studying, owning, and sharing Torah. We all have a seat at the table, or at least our own table within the greater dining hall of Judaism and Moishe House community, so to speak.

Shavuot is a unique instance in Jewish history where we experienced the unity of Jewish community - what a thought! What was that moment like? Is it possible to live that experience today on any scale? Do we even pine for that anymore?

At the same time, it was a moment of radical individualism. How can we create unity without uniformity? (How) can we both feel we are One, while realizing we are a diverse community made up of individuals who see the world through different lenses? How can we share space and mission when we feel less than comfortable with the takes of others in the room? How can we sing the same song, while recognizing many voices - Kulanu with Koleinu ('all of us' with 'our voices')?

That is what we will explore in our learning today. We hope you leave this conversation with knowledge of a new text or two, an appreciation for one another's experiences building and taking part in diverse, inclusive community, and maybe a little bit of hope that expanding our circles by at least another ring is possible!

Questions:

• For these texts and commentaries, what unites a community?
• What are the beautiful and more dangerous aspects of this vision of unity? Where does diversity or difference fit in here?
• Do you feel the Jewish people actually united as One, as they were at Sinai? What else binds or should bind the Jewish people? What are the strengths / weaknesses of these bonds?

One Definition of Pluralism

Dr. Yehudah Kurtzer, President of Shalom Hartman Institute of North America

The central problem with the argument that “all perspectives should get equal airtime” is that it strips true pluralism of its ability to reform and transform societies. True pluralism is not moral relativism: It is rooted in the belief that truth itself includes a diversity of viewpoints, and it translates into the commitment to build societies of mutual respect. Pluralism is a belief system in which we make room for the opinions and whole selves of others, and a tool to build a society that is improved by the presence of difference. E pluribus unum, if you will.

...the rabbinic tradition does not conflate ends and means, nor does it believe that the content of these debates is so irrelevant that all opinions matter...the Talmud goes on to say that [even though opinions of both the schools of Shammai and Hillel are those of the Living God] the law follows the school of Hillel. To not cite the resolution is to value rabbinic debate and ignore rabbinic normativity. It is hard to imagine a deeper misunderstanding of the rabbinic tradition...

• What about it do you find affirming, challenging, or confusing about this definition of pluralism?
• How else might you define pluralism?

• Do you agree with this take?
• Whether or not this would make sense in our own justice system today, what character traits or behaviors do you think such an approach is meant to develop within each of us?
• Can you recall a moment where you appreciated a voice that was the minority in the room, regardless of whether or not it moved the needle? Or a person who is frequently a minority voice, but whose opinions you appreciate nonetheless?

Three Takes on Individuals @ Sinai

• Taken together, how do these visions of the Jewish community at Sinai differ from texts about unity above?
• When have you actually felt that it was a blessing that "minds are unlike each other and faces are unlike each other"?
• If this model of pluralism solves some of the challenges of unity above, what new curses or challenges does the validity of 600,000 interpretations bring?

Synthesizing Kulanu, with Koleinu: A Few Closing Questions and Approaches

• In your communities or in your experience, how do you synthesize Kulanu with Koleinu, all of us with all of our voices, unity without uniformity?
• Do you think it is important to feel a sense of Jewish unity across all/most differences? What does that unity look like, and who is included / excluded for you?

Consider these approaches to engaging with those who hold fundamentally different opinions or outlooks, to marching in-step for justice with those we are not 100% aligned with, to being in community with together without silencing voices.

Is one of these behaviors or mindsets one you can adopt in your communities?

Trying to Deeply Understand, Without Gaslighting Ourselves

Rabbi Melissa Weintraub and Dr. Eyal Rabinovitch, "Slowing Down the Conversation"

In a context as polarized as Israel, we open the space to meaningful communication across disagreement when we show others we “get” them or at least are sincerely trying to. When we focus instead on making our case – no matter how compelling and substantiated – if we haven’t demonstrated to our interlocutors that we “get” them, it simply won’t land. Rather than listening to find flaws, we [seek to] listen to help others articulate what matters most to them. We listen to identify the concerns, values, emotions, and stories that drive them. More generally, we alter our intention from winning an argument to seeking out comprehensive understanding. When I demonstrate that I have both the desire and willingness to understand you as you wish to be understood, when I prove to you that I see you as you wish to be seen, I maximize the likelihood that you will listen to me in return.

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• If this was easy, it probably wouldn't need to be said! What is so hard about making "chambers within chambers" or making space for opinions that differ from our own?
• Moreover, what guidance do you think we need or have for making space for opinions that we consider to be "impure"?
• Can you think of any people or positions you find to be more on the "impure" side you wish you could make just a little space for?

We need an understanding of communal unity that is substantive yet not repressive.

Rabbi Shlomo Wolbe, in his work Alei Shor, presents us with one such understanding through his fascinating interpretation of revelation. He cites a midrash (Exodus Rabbah 29:1) that each person at Sinai experienced revelation according to his/her ability. He connects this to an idea from the Ramchal (Rabbi Moshe Chaim Luzzatto) that “there are 600,000 explanations of the Torah, and each person received an interpretation according to the root of his/her soul.”

This seems like extreme individualism, the opposite of unity. Rabbi Wolbe answers this challenge with the first of the ten commandments: “‘I am the Lord your G-d’ – everything comes from G-d’s unity.” Our unity is about connecting ourselves to our source – God and the Torah. So why the need for one heart? He explains: to be able to hold the Torah in its entirety – all 600,000 interpretations.

The communal unity that Rabbi Wolbe describes requires a humility to acknowledge that each of us contains only a partial truth. We therefore need each other to gain a more complete understanding of the truth. This is an understanding of unity that elevates rather than eradicates differences.

This relates perfectly to this week’s Torah portion, which begins with a census: “Raise up the head of the whole Israelite community…” (Numbers 1:2).

The Ishbitzer Rebbe writes on this verse:

The reason for raising the heads is as we have learned in the Talmud (Berachot, 58a): “This one’s mind is not like that one’s mind.” G-d apportioned each person unique goodness and life, for no two people are the same. Therefore it says “Raise up the head,” meaning, each one has to be raised up in the appropriate spot, and through this, everyone in the right place will be seen to be special and unique… if one person should take the place of another, then the whole tribe is incomplete. As, for instance, when somebody plants an orchard with a certain beautiful symmetry: if a single plant is missing or exchanged with another, it’s obvious that the orchard is incomplete.

Unity, then, is the opposite of uniformity and is rooted in an appreciation for each person’s individuality. Justice is the work of translating that idea into a reality by upholding the dignity of every person. This Shavuot, may we open our hearts to difference, allowing us to see the Torah, and our world, more expansively.

https://hevria.com/yocheved/pluralism-just-doesnt/

Pluralism.

The latest, arguably most prominent, It concept in Jewish community.

A value any self-respecting Jew espouses to.

Of course we respect all kinds.

Of course we make space for different practices and beliefs.

Of course every person, regardless of background, affiliation, or values, has a unique role within the greater Jewish community.

Of course we authentically respect what each person or community adds to this diverse, nuanced ecosystem.

Of course.

I often find myself in very pluralistic settings, in many different capacities.

...What does pluralism really even mean?

If you have a pie dish that’s full of pie slices, each of a different flavor (cherry, peach, apple- you get my point) – how, if at all, are you really creating one pie? Is the physical proximity of all those pieces to each other enough enough to feel like there’s some purpose for them to be squashed together into one dish? Or are we just creating an illusion of closeness?

What, essentially, are we gaining when we bring Jews of different types together? Creating dialogue? Opportunities for learning? What is the real benefit of exposure? How do we create bridges that reach further than simple novelty?...

...Where is the sense of collective responsibility and authentic interest in one another? Are we just playing lip service to each other? Do we secretly believe ‘our way’ is the best?...

Pluralism isn’t enough. It just doesn’t do it for me.

And maybe it’s not about pluralism at all. Not about different people coming together to try to form something together, learn ways to respect differences and tease out a common, even fractured, language.

Maybe it’s really about Unity.

The awareness that underneath it all, despite our differences, we share so much in common.

Something so deep and visceral and real.

Something G-dly.

Yes, we make different choices.

We do things differently.

Like prayer.

Some with a mechitzah, some egalitarian, in partnership; some with chanting, some in Hebrew; some with a quorum, some in solitude; some only in a synagogue, some only in a field; some with women leading the prayers, some with women in the back, whispering in silence; some only on the Days of Awe, some three times a day; some from a well-worn prayer book, some only with their own words, different every time; some only in joy, some only in pain; some as a political statement, some as song; some to Gd, some to the spirit within.

Yet we all pray.

Isn’t that what’s most important?

Every 19th of Kislev, a Hasidic holiday, the teachers at my school give a special lesson to the preschoolers. It is absolutely my favorite lesson of all. They sit around the rug and the teacher lays out all kinds of candles: a shabbat candle, havdalah candle, oil lamp, menorah, tall candle, short candle, candelabra and lantern and more.

“Friends, what do you see?”

They each call out a another type of candle. They each point out how different they are, one from the next.

“Now let’s turn off the lights.”

Slowly, each candle is lit. Slowly, the room fills with light.

“Friends, what do you see?”

“We see flames! We see light!”

“Yes. Even though each candle looks different on the outside, each one has a flame. Each one gives light. So too every person in this world. We may look and act differently on the outside, but inside each one of us, we have a flame.”

And in this way, they encounter the Soul.

What would it look like if we started our conversations there, at the points of convergence, in the space where we are ultimately one, unified, intimately bound?

What might happen if instead of seeing Reform, Conservative, Modern Orthodox, Progressive, Chabad, or any particular political stance or agenda, we saw a Jew? A person? A soul?

I’m not suggesting we dismiss differences or pretend they are not there.

I am not suggesting that we are all the same.

I am suggesting that to radically recognize those things that make our communities so unique, we need to start with a different frame.

The question is not, how we can all co-exist despite our differences?

The question is, how we can all thrive, in light of what unites us all?...