Some Implications of Teshuvah:
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Teshuvah: Who Am I?
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Change Your Habits, Change Your Life
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It Is All Up to Me
Talk It Out
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What do you think this poem is really about?
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How would you answer the zebra’s questions in the poem?
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What words would you use to describe who you really are?
Rabbi Abraham Isaac Hakohen Kook, Orot haTeshuvah 5:6
שלמותם של החיים היא דוקא עם המשך התגלותם על פי טבעם העצמי. וכיון שהטבע היא מצד עצמו אינו בעל הסתכלות והבחנה, הרי החטא מכרח הוא מצד זה. ואין אדם צדיק בארץ אשר יעשה טוב ולא יחטא. ובטול עצם טבעיותם של החיים, כדי שיהיה האדם בלתי-חוטא, זהו עצמו החטא היותר גדול, ״וכפר עליו מאשר חטא על הנפש״. על כן התשובה מתקנת את הקלקול ומחזירה את העולם ואת החיים למקורו דוקא בגילוי יסוד עצמיותם העליון, עולם החרות, ועל שם כך מכנים שם ה׳ אלקים חיים.
A person’s life is perfected by developing his inherent character. And since one’s still-undeveloped character lacks insight, sin is guaranteed along this path of development. “There is no righteous person in the land who will commit good and not sin.” [Kohelet 7:20] On the other hand, eliminating one’s natural character in order to prevent sin is itself the greatest sin, [regarding which the Torah says of the nazir in Bamidbar 6:11,] “He shall atone for his sin against life.”
Therefore, Teshuvah repairs the damage [caused by sin and trying to be someone you are not] and restores the world and this person’s life to its root, precisely by helping the inherent character to develop.
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בראש כל האדם חייב להתבונן היטב ולחקור ולדעת מהי חובתו המיוחדת בעולמו, מהו הענין המיוחד שבשבילו ירד לעולם . . . |
Rabbi Shalom Brezovsky, Netivot Shalom, Vol. 1, Netivei Da’at, Chapter 6:2, p. 30
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Before anything else, a person is obligated to reflect upon and search out what is his/her unique mission for the sake of which he descended to the world . . . |
מקום שבעלי תשובה עומדין צדיקים גמורים אינם עומדין
The place which the penitent occupy, the perfectly righteous are unable to occupy
(ב) וּמַה הִיא הַתְּשׁוּבָה. הוּא שֶׁיַּעֲזֹב הַחוֹטֵא חֶטְאוֹ וִיסִירוֹ מִמַּחֲשַׁבְתּוֹ וְיִגְמֹר בְּלִבּוֹ שֶׁלֹּא יַעֲשֵׂהוּ עוֹד שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (ישעיה נה-ז) "יַעֲזֹב רָשָׁע דַּרְכּוֹ" וְגוֹ'. וְכֵן יִתְנַחֵם עַל שֶׁעָבַר שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (ירמיה לא-יח) "כִּי אַחֲרֵי שׁוּבִי נִחַמְתִּי". וְיָעִיד עָלָיו יוֹדֵעַ תַּעֲלוּמוֹת שֶׁלֹּא יָשׁוּב לְזֶה הַחֵטְא לְעוֹלָם שֶׁנֶּאֱמַר (הושע יד-ד) "וְלֹא נֹאמַר עוֹד אֱלֹהֵינוּ לְמַעֲשֵׂה יָדֵינוּ" וְגוֹ'. וְצָרִיךְ לְהִתְוַדּוֹת בִּשְׂפָתָיו וְלוֹמַר עִנְיָנוֹת אֵלּוּ שֶׁגָּמַר בְּלִבּוֹ:
(2) What is teshuvah? It is when a person abandons the sin that he sinned and removes it from his thoughts and commits in his heart that he will not do it again, as it says, The wicked should abandon his path etc. (Isaiah 55:7). And also that he regrets sinning, as it says, After I returned I regretted (Jeremiah 31:18). And the One Who Knows Hidden Things testifies about him that he will never return to this sin, as it says, And we will no longer call the work of our hands “god” etc. (Hosea 14:4). And he must confess verbally and say these things that he has committed in his heart.
Ask: Were you able to spot the four steps of teshuvah listed in the Rambam?
They are usually described as:
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Azivat ha-chet-- stop doing the bad action
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Charatah - remorse for having done the bad action
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Viduy - verbal confession
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Kabbalah l’atid - resolving, and making a plan, to never repeat these actions
Talk It Out
- How do you make a successful plan to abandon a bad habit?
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Is it really possible to make sure that you don’t repeat the action in the future?
It was said of Rabbi Eleazar ben Dordaya that he did not leave out any harlot in the world without coming to her. Once, on hearing that there was a certain harlot in one of the towns by the sea who accepted a purse of denarii for her hire, he took a purse of denarii and crossed seven rivers for her sake. As he was with her, she blew forth breath and said: As this blown breath will not return to its place, so will Eleazar ben Dordaya never be received in repentance.
He thereupon went, sat between two hills and mountains and exclaimed: “O, you hills and mountains, plead for mercy for me!”
They replied: “How shall we pray for you? We stand in need of it ourselves, for it is said, ‘For the mountains shall depart and the hills be removed!’” (Isaiah 54:10)
So he exclaimed: “Heaven and earth, plead you for mercy for me!”
They, too, replied: “How shall we pray for you? We stand in need of it ourselves, for it is said, ‘For the heavens shall vanish away like smoke, and the earth shall wax old like a garment.’” (Isaiah 51:6)
He then exclaimed: “Sun and moon, plead you for mercy for me!”
But they also replied: “How shall we pray for you? We stand in need of it ourselves, for it is said, ‘Then the moon shall be confounded and the sun ashamed.’” (Isaiah 24:23)
He exclaimed: “You stars and constellations, plead you for mercy for me!”
Said they: How shall we pray for you? We stand in need of it ourselves, for it is said, ‘And all the hosts of heaven shall moulder away.’” (Isaiah 34:4)
Said he: “The matter then depends upon me alone!” Having placed his head between his
knees, he wept aloud until his soul departed.
Then a bat-kol (heavenly voice) was heard proclaiming: “Rabbi Eleazar ben Dordaya is destined for the life of the world to come!”
. . .
Rabbi [on hearing of it] wept and said: One may acquire eternal life after many years, another in one hour! Rabbi also said: Not only are penitents accepted, they are even called 'Rabbi'!
והאמר ריש לקיש גדולה תשובה שזדונות נעשות לו כזכיות שנאמר (יחזקאל לג, יט) ובשוב רשע מרשעתו ועשה משפט וצדקה עליהם (חיה) יחיה... כאן מאהבה.
And yet, Reish Lakish said: Repentance is great, for intentional sins are made for him into virtues, as it says: (Ezekiel 33:19), "And when the wicked person turns from wickedness, and does that which is lawful and right, he shall live upon them"...and this is speaking about repentance motivated by love.
Reish Lakish, a Talmudic rabbi who himself repented midway through his life, argues that repentance is such a great force in the world that it can actual turn past sins into virtues. This, however, is true only when this teshuvah is motivated by love - perhaps love of another person, love of a life-well lived, or love of doing the right thing. When teshuvah is deep and well-intentioned, it can be truly transformational. What do you think it means that past sins are turned into virtues? What kind of love might motivate a person to make this kind of change?
הֲשִׁיבֵנוּ אָבִינוּ לְתורָתֶךָ. וְקָרְבֵנוּ מַלְכֵּנוּ לַעֲבודָתֶךָ וְהַחֲזִירֵנוּ בִּתְשׁוּבָה שְׁלֵמָה לְפָנֶיךָ. בָּרוּךְ אַתָּה ה', הָרוצֶה בִּתְשׁוּבָה:
Return us, our Father, to Your Torah, and draw us near, our King, to Your service. Cause us to return to You in perfect repentance before Your face. Blessed are You, O Lord, Who desires repentance.
This piece comes from the traditional text of the Amidah, the prayer of silent devotion that is part of the daily liturgy. The prayer asks God to take an active role in our repentance and help the process along. Teshuvah in this prayer is described as "drawing near" to God. What makes you feel close to the Divine or spiritually connected, and when do you experience a disconnect? Do you think there are behaviors of yours that you could change that would allow you to experience "nearness" more frequently?
Our character is reflected in our actions and our relationships. But neither is the whole story. Some revelations call for introspection. Who am I? Have I become the person I was meant to be or am I betraying or trivializing my destiny?
Look at a picture of your childhood self. Would that child be proud of the adult you have become? No one else on earth can answer that for you. Elul calls us to be deep sea divers into our souls...This is a time of year for repentance—acknowledgment, reparations, healing.
Equally it is a time for discovery. Only by apprehending who we are can we shape real hopes about who we might become. Forge ahead without fear into the mystery of your own soul and emerge wiser this year, and kinder.
Rabbi Wolpe's piece recognizes that every one of can think of ways in which we do not live up to our own expectations. The process of teshuvah is one of inner reckoning; we can take the time to recall who is is we want to be, and think seriously about the "healing" that needs to happen in order for us to make that a reality. How would you answer Rabbi Wolpe's question about the expectations of your childhood self? What might this process of introspection and change look like in your own life?
The Wheel: Jerome J. Garcia, Robert C. Hunter, William Kreutzmann
The wheel is turning and you can't slow down
You can't let go and you can't hold on
You can't go back and you can't stand still
If the thunder don't get you then the lightning will
Won't you try just a little bit harder
Couldn't you try just a little bit more
Won't you try just a little bit harder
Couldn't you try just a little bit more
Round, round, Robin run around
Gotta get back where you belong
Little bit harder, just a little bit more
Little bit further than you gone before
The wheel is turning and you can't slow down
You can't let go and you can't hold on
You can't go back and you can't stand still
If the thunder don't get you then the lightning will
Small wheel turning by the fire and rod
Big wheel turning by the grace of God
Every time that wheel turn round
Bound to cover just a little more ground
The wheel is turning and you can't slow down
You can't let go and you can't hold on
You can't go back and you can't stand still
If the thunder don't get you then the lightning will
Won't you try just a little bit harder
Couldn't you try just a little bit more
Won't you try just a little bit harder
Couldn't you try just a little bit more
This song expresses how we might often feel as we move through life; we can't slow down, and we can't go back. Nevertheless, each time we can push to "try just a little bit harder." The message of teshuvah is that even as we feel ourselves stuck in a loop, change is always possible, if we try just a bit more. What song or other piece of art inspires you to want to change?